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Do What The F**k I Say
Do What The F**k I Say
Aug 25, 2025 10:50 PM

Author:Sebastian Melmoth II,Felix Dennis

Do What The F**k I Say

A poem for every parent pushed to the edge of sanity by their unruly offspring, Sebastian Melmoth II’s Do What The Fuck I Say provides a uniquely irreverent perspective on the frustrations of parenthood, featuring 48 pages of dynamic colour illustrations.

A refreshingly frank and riotously funny depiction of the unspoken parental trials of frazzled fathers and maddened mums alike, Melmoth’s poem is a breath of fresh air for any parent who has ever been tempted to tell their little darlings to Do What The Fuck I Say.

Reviews

He writes the most profound poetry about the most simple natural things.

—— Benjamin Zephaniah

Marvellous stuff...the best poet writing in the English language.

—— Tom Wolfe

He is the very essence of English poetry - lyrical, rhythmic, emotional.

—— Jon Snow

The uncrowned Poet Laureate...he writes in the language of the soul.

—— Christopher Rush

A brilliant and very readable portrait of the mother-daughter relationship

—— Candis

Brown's winning debut teaches a hopeful truth: Sometimes, just as you're starting to drown, things fall back into place.

—— People

Part Desperate Housewives, part American Beauty - entirely gripping

—— Scarlet

A razor-sharp critique of the absurd expectations that, these days, have come to stand for ambition, "All We Ever Wanted Was Everything" is wrenching, riveting, and still manages to be great fun. This is a wise, intimate chronicle of one family's struggle to take off their masks and live in the place they most feared: the real, imperfect world

—— Meghan Daum, author of 'The Quality of Life Report'

Rarely does a first novelist write with such confidence and grace. 'All We Ever Wanted Was Everything' is a marvelous book

—— Ayelet Waldman, author of "Love and Other Impossible Pursuits

Hill's taut prose exudes a constant darkness... you are left unsettled and haunted by the seeming inevitability of their troubled lives

—— Stylist

Taut, tense story, written with that unsparing economy which is such a feature of Hill's recent fiction

—— Matthew Dennison , The Times

The versatile Hill tells a perfectly judged story of people living hard, narrow lives

—— Observer

So well-written, so deeply imagined, that the reader will find delight even in the encircling gloom. Love may not conquer all, but Art can

—— Scotsman

[Hill] does what all good writers must set out to do: she made me read until I had the answer

—— M J Hyland , Guardian

Hill’s sparse style provides the perfect medium for exploring this family’s predicament

—— Matthew Dennison , The TImes

Hill does a wonderful job of evoking life in this enclosed community

—— Emma Hagestadt , Independent

A masterpiece of economy and control

—— Good Book Guide
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