Part Five: Chapter 4

by Leo Tolstoy

　　"They've come!" "Here he is!" "Which one?" "Rather young, eh?""Why, my dear soul, she looks more dead than alive!" were thecomments in the crowd, when Levin, meeting his bride in theentrance, walked with her into the church.

　　Stepan Arkadyevitch told his wife the cause of the delay, and theguests were whispering it with smiles to one another. Levin sawnothing and no one; he did not take his eyes off his bride.

　　Everyone said she had lost her looks dreadfully of late, and wasnot nearly so pretty on her wedding day as usual; but Levin didnot think so. He looked at her hair done up high, with the longwhite veil and white flowers and the high, stand-up, scallopedcollar, that in such a maidenly fashion hid her long neck at thesides and only showed it in front, her strikingly slender figure,and it seemed to him that she looked better than ever--notbecause these flowers, this veil, this gown from Paris addedanything to her beauty; but because, in spite of the elaboratesumptuousness of her attire, the expression of her sweet face, ofher eyes, of her lips was still her own characteristic expressionof guileless truthfulness.

　　"I was beginning to think you meant to run away," she said, andsmiled to him.

　　"It's so stupid, what happened to me, I'm ashamed to speak ofit!" he said, reddening, and he was obliged to turn to SergeyIvanovitch, who came up to him.

　　"This is a pretty story of yours about the shirt!" said SergeyIvanovitch, shaking his head and smiling.

　　"Yes, yes!" answered Levin, without an idea of what they weretalking about.

　　"Now, Kostya, you have to decide," said Stepan Arkadyevitch withan air of mock dismay, "a weighty question. You are at thismoment just in the humor to appreciate all its gravity. They askme, are they to light the candles that have been lighted beforeor candles that have never been lighted? It's a matter of tenroubles," he added, relaxing his lips into a smile. "I havedecided, but I was afraid you might not agree."

　　Levin saw it was a joke, but he could not smile.

　　"Well, how's it to be then?--unlighted or lighted candles? that'sthe question."

　　"Yes, yes, unlighted."

　　"Oh, I'm very glad. The question's decided!" said StepanArkadyevitch, smiling. "How silly men are, though, in thisposition," he said to Tchirikov, when Levin, after lookingabsently at him, had moved back to his bride.

　　"Kitty, mind you're the first to step on the carpet," saidCountess Nordston, coming up. "You're a nice person!" she saidto Levin.

　　"Aren't you frightened, eh?" said Marya Dmitrievna, an old aunt.

　　"Are you cold? You're pale. Stop a minute, stoop down," saidKitty's sister, Madame Lvova, and with her plump, handsome armsshe smilingly set straight the flowers on her head.

　　Dolly came up, tried to say something, but could not speak, criedand then laughed unnaturally.

　　Kitty looked at all of them with the same absent eyes as Levin.

　　Meanwhile the officiating clergy had got into their vestments,and the priest and deacon came out to the lectern, which stood inthe forepart of the church. The priest turned to Levin sayingsomething. Levin did not hear what the priest said.

　　"Take the bride's hand and lead her up," the best man said toLevin.

　　It was a long while before Levin could make out what was expectedof him. For a long time they tried to set him right and made himbegin again--because he kept taking Kitty by the wrong arm orwith the wrong arm--till he understood at last that what he hadto do was, without changing his position, to take her right handin his right hand. When at last he had taken the bride's hand inthe correct way, the priest walked a few paces in front of themand stopped at the lectern. The crowd of friends and relationsmoved after them, with a buzz of talk and a rustle of skirts.Someone stooped down and pulled out the bride's train. Thechurch became so still that the drops of wax could be heardfalling from the candles.

　　The little old priest in his ecclesiastical cap, with his longsilvery-gray locks of hair parted behind his ears, was fumblingwith something at the lectern, putting out his little old handsfrom under the heavy silver vestment with the gold cross on theback of it.

　　Stepan Arkadyevitch approached him cautiously, whisperedsomething, and making a sign to Levin, walked back again.

　　The priest lighted two candles, wreathed with flowers, andholding them sideways so that the wax dropped slowly from them heturned, facing the bridal pair. The priest was the same old manthat had confessed Levin. He looked with weary and melancholyeyes at the bride and bridegroom, sighed, and putting his righthand out from his vestment, blessed the bridegroom with it, andalso with a shade of solicitous tenderness laid the crossedfingers on the bowed head of Kitty. Then he gave them thecandles, and taking the censer, moved slowly away from them.

　　"Can it be true?" thought Levin, and he looked round at hisbride. Looking down at her he saw her face in profile, and fromthe scarcely perceptible quiver of her lips and eyelashes he knewshe was aware of his eyes upon her. She did not look round, butthe high scalloped collar, that reached her little pink ear,trembled faintly. He saw that a sigh was held back in herthroat, and the little hand in the long glove shook as it heldthe candle.

　　All the fuss of the shirt, of being late, all the talk of friendsand relations, their annoyance, his ludicrous position--allsuddenly passed way and he was filled with joy and dread.

　　The handsome, stately head-deacon wearing a silver robe and hiscurly locks standing out at each side of his head, steppedsmartly forward, and lifting his stole on two fingers, stoodopposite the priest.

　　"Blessed be the name of the Lord," the solemn syllables rang outslowly one after another, setting the air quivering with waves ofsound.

　　"Blessed is the name of our God, from the beginning, is now, andever shall be," the little old priest answered in a submissive,piping voice, still fingering something at the lectern. And thefull chorus of the unseen choir rose up, filling the wholechurch, from the windows to the vaulted roof, with broad waves ofmelody. It grew stronger, rested for an instant, and slowly diedaway.

　　They prayed, as they always do, for peace from on high and forsalvation, for the Holy Synod, and for the Tsar; they prayed,too, for the servants of God, Konstantin and Ekaterina, nowplighting their troth.

　　"Vouchsafe to them love made perfect, peace and help, O Lord, webeseech Thee," the whole church seemed to breathe with the voiceof the head deacon.

　　Levin heard the words, and they impressed him. "How did theyguess that it is help, just help that one wants?" he thought,recalling all his fears and doubts of late. "What do I know?what can I do in this fearful business," he thought, "withouthelp? Yes, it is help I want now."

　　When the deacon had finished the prayer for the Imperial family,the priest turned to the bridal pair with a book: "Eternal God,that joinest together in love them that were separate," he readin a gentle, piping voice: "who hast ordained the union of holywedlock that cannot be set asunder, Thou who didst bless Isaacand Rebecca and their descendants, according to Thy HolyCovenant; bless Thy servants, Konstantin and Ekaterina, leadingthem in the path of all good works. For gracious and mercifulart Thou, our Lord, and glory be to Thee, the Father, the Son,and the Holy Ghost, now and ever shall be."

　　"Amen!" the unseen choir sent rolling again upon the air.

　　" 'Joinest together in love them that were separate.' What deepmeaning in those words, and how they correspond with what onefeels at this moment," thought Levin. "Is she feeling the sameas I?"

　　And looking round, he met her eyes, and from their expression heconcluded that she was understanding it just as he was. But thiswas a mistake; she almost completely missed the meaning of thewords of the service; she had not heard them, in fact. She couldnot listen to them and take them in, so strong was the onefeeling that filled her breast and grew stronger and stronger.That feeling was joy at the completion of the process that forthe last month and a half had been going on in her soul, and hadduring those six weeks been a joy and a torture to her. On theday when in the drawing room of the house in Arbaty Street shehad gone up to him in her brown dress, and given herself to himwithout a word--on that day, at that hour, there took place inher heart a complete severance from all her old life, and a quitedifferent, new, utterly strange life had begun for her, while theold life was actually going on as before. Those six weeks hadfor her been a time of the utmost bliss and the utmost misery.All her life, all her desires and hopes were concentrated on thisone man, still uncomprehended by her, to whom she was bound by afeeling of alternate attraction and repulsion, even lesscomprehended than the man himself, and all the while she wasgoing on living in the outward conditions of her old life.Living the old life, she was horrified at herself, at her utterinsurmountable callousness to all her own past, to things, tohabits, to the people she had loved, who loved her--to hermother, who was wounded by her indifference, to her kind, tenderfather, till then dearer than all the world. At one moment shewas horrified at this indifference, at another she rejoiced atwhat had brought her to this indifference. She could not frame athought, not a wish apart from life with this man; but this newlife was not yet, and she could not even picture it clearly toherself. There was only anticipation, the dread and joy of thenew and the unknown. And now behold--anticipation anduncertainty and remorse at the abandonment of the old life--allwas ending, and the new was beginning. This new life could notbut have terrors for her inexperience; but, terrible or not, thechange had been wrought six weeks before in her soul, and thiswas merely the final sanction of what had long been completed inher heart.

　　Turning again to the lectern, the priest with some difficultytook Kitty's little ring, and asking Levin for his hand, put iton the first joint of his finger. "The servant of God,Konstantin, plights his troth to the servant of God, Ekaterina."And putting his big ring on Kitty's touchingly weak, pink littlefinger, the priest said the same thing.

　　And the bridal pair tried several times to understand what theyhad to do, and each time made some mistake and were corrected bythe priest in a whisper. At last, having duly performed theceremony, having signed the rings with the cross, the priesthanded Kitty the big ring, and Levin the little one. Again theywere puzzled and passed the rings from hand to hand, stillwithout doing what was expected.

　　Dolly, Tchirikov, and Stepan Arkadyevitch stepped forward to setthem right. There was an interval of hesitation, whispering, andsmiles; but the expression of solemn emotion on the faces of thebetrothed pair did not change: on the contrary, in theirperplexity over their hands they looked more grave and deeplymoved than before, and the smile with which Stepan Arkadyevitchwhispered to them that now they would each put on their own ringdied away on his lips. He had a feeling that any smile would jaron them.

　　"Thou who didst from the beginning create male and female," thepriest read after the exchange of rings, "from Thee woman wasgiven to man to be a helpmeet to him, and for the procreation ofchildren. O Lord, our God, who hast poured down the blessings ofThy Truth according to Thy Holy Covenant upon Thy chosenservants, our fathers, from generation to generation, bless Thyservants Konstantin and Ekaterina, and make their troth fast infaith, and union of hearts, and truth, and love...."

　　Levin felt more and more that all his ideas of marriage, all hisdreams of how he would order his life, were mere childishness,and that it was something he had not understood hitherto, and nowunderstood less than ever, though it was being performed uponhim. The lump in his throat rose higher and higher, tears thatwould not be checked came into his eyes.